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cheekytrolly
Chief Captain
Joined: Nov 30, 2005
Posts: 1633
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 Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 12:37 am Post subject: Only in Britain... |
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Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and put our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain... do we buy hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of eight.
Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. !
Only in Britain... are there handicapped parking places in front of a skating rink.
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
101 people since 1999 have had to have broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars. |
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WarHawk42
Captain
Joined: Jun 14, 2004
Posts: 826
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 1:34 am Post subject: |
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 Most of that you could substitute the U.S. for Briton and be correct. |
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Insight
Chief Captain
Joined: Feb 17, 2005
Posts: 1275
Location: UK, South East
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:20 am Post subject: |
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lol yeh 
I you would have to add a few for the US like
"Only in the US can a woman order a coffee and sue the company after spilling it on herself and getting burned"
and
"Only in the US can a man try and scratch an itch in his nostril with a power drill and end up tearing his nose off and still attempt to sue the company claiming they had no warning on the packaging"
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Liono
Chief Captain
Joined: Jan 17, 2005
Posts: 1644
Location: Northwich (Cheshire) England.
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:22 am Post subject: |
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| Insight wrote: | lol yeh
I you would have to add a few for the US like
"Only in the US can a woman order a coffee and sue the company after spilling it on herself and getting burned"
and
"Only in the US can a man try and scratch an itch in his nostril with a power drill and end up tearing his nose off and still attempt to sue the company claiming they had no warning on the packaging"
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(this is post 666 so be a ware of the  )
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Liono
Chief Captain
Joined: Jan 17, 2005
Posts: 1644
Location: Northwich (Cheshire) England.
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:28 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. |
There's never a screwdriver around in my house put loads of knives...
| Quote: | | 101 people since 1999 have had to have broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet |
Those green little army fiqures are awsome and are meant to be left on the floor
| Quote: | | 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth |
They should make the hole big enough so us somkers can enjoy our smoke while getting dressed
| Quote: | | A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth |
Done that very painfull.
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Micah
Captain
Joined: Mar 06, 2004
Posts: 595
Location: West Sussex, England
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:40 am Post subject: |
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All excellent and so true. Makes you proud to be british......not!!
Micah
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Insight
Chief Captain
Joined: Feb 17, 2005
Posts: 1275
Location: UK, South East
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 12:06 pm Post subject: |
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lol I would love to see some of the stats for the US
Incidentally, the bits of broken toy from foot... thats the kids fault!!!
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fourby
First Officer
Joined: Oct 22, 2005
Posts: 220
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| Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 12:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Insight wrote: |
"Only in the US can a man try and scratch an itch in his nostril with a power drill and end up tearing his nose off and still attempt to sue the company claiming they had no warning on the packaging" |
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NoWorries
Captain
Joined: Jul 22, 2005
Posts: 639
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| Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 5:04 am Post subject: Re: Only in Britain... |
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| Quote: | | 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. |
More evidence for the banning of knives from Britain.  |
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